25 September 2010

maternal instinct

i have written a post similar to this before but i have to revisit it. it comes up SO much. probably because i'm a first time mom.

and also, recently i was featured over at a little king and i (go check it out by the way!), and two of her questions were really thought provoking for me. they were:

"what is something you wished someone would have told you before you became a mommy"


"do you have any advise for first time/soon-to-be mommies?"

to me, the answer to these questions are very similar.

i feel like people have all kinds of advise for me, and believe me- i'm thankful! i truly appreciate and consider everyone's thoughts and advise when it comes to parenting.

but with that said - every person, every baby, every situation is different.

though i'm so grateful all of the wonderful wisdom from other mommies, i think it's SO important to follow my own maternal instinct. and i believe every mother has it. regardless of what my friends, family, or even the 'experts' say - my maternal instinct is above all else, the thing i trust most. there were so many times that i felt lost and confused as to what to do with my newborn, my 7 month old. i would go online and research, i'd ask friends for advise, and i'm so glad i did all of these things because it does truly help. but what i've realized is that i already knew what i needed to do all along, i was just looking for confirmation. sometimes i got it, and sometimes i didn't. but that really doesn't matter. what matters is that i listen to my gut, the way down deep voice that knows exactly what my baby needs from me. whether people would agree with me, or not. i know that i always have my child's best interests at heart, i always want what is best for him and i am the ONLY person (desides dad, of course) that knows what that is. i spend a lot of time thinking and praying about how to raise my son. and believe it or not, it contradicts most of what is generally accepted as normal.

here is my advise to new or soon to be moms: {take it or leave it}

as a mother, there is so much pressure on us to do the "right" thing, but there really isn't ONE right answer to anything. what is right for me and my baby may not be right for you and yours.
i think there's also a lot of pressure on our generation to follow the trends. and there are lots of them. bare in mind that these popular trends may not be suitable or even realistic for your family. and that's okay.

i think it's important to read through the material out there, talk to other mom's, read our mommy blogs, but at the end of the day.... your maternal instinct will tell you what to do.

follow your heart. and you will never regret it.

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Jhen.Stark said...

Yay for your new feature... this morning I found you ALL over the blog world :0) First A Little King and I, and then the Paper Mama. You go girl!!!

I am 100% behind you on your answer. It's something I discovered after a few trial and errors, but I'm getting it now. Just me and my baby and what I BELIEVE IS RIGHT FOR HER. Luckily, I had a doctor put me in my place! I asked him if her height and weight is average or normal, he looked at me and said "For her it is... our country needs to stop comparing. She is just perfect." Whoo- through me for a loop but I loved that about him. So now, I'm resting in what the mommy in me says to do... and it is so much easier! ;0)

Shannon said...

Adorable pictures!! :)
I'm just stopping by to invite you to come check out the blog party/giveaway that is going on right now on my blog! There are eight giveaways, so there are a ton of chances to win some cool stuff; it ends next Wednesday. Hope to see you there! :D
Happy Saturday,

AmyLee said...

I completely agree with you! I always feel like I know deep down what I need to do, but go ask other moms for a little validation. When I don't like their answers, I'll do my thing anyways.

Example: we've let Parker nap on his tummy since he was a month old (at night he sleeps find swaddled on his back). In the day, he was NOT having the swaddle & wouldn't sleep. We gave in & started letting him nap on his tummy & he has been the happiest baby in the world ever since. How many moms would tell you not to do that? Well, it would still freak me out & I would check on him every two minutes (literally!) but it's what we needed to do to have a happy baby & a sane momma!

Ok, long example. Just wanted to let you know I can relate!

Dina @ 4 Lettre Words said...

LOVE your answers! I'm a non-conventional (breastfeed forever and co-sleeping,but stresses independence) mom. :o)

I would also add..."it" doesn't necessarily get easier. "It" does, however, get BETTER...and BETTER...and BETTER...

Kiara Buechler said...

Michelle and I were just talking about this yesterday. It is nice to have friends, family, and the Internet to turn to with questions, but when it comes down to it, we do what works for us to raise our babes in the best way we can. What works for one babe doesn't work for others, and that is okay! I am grateful to have friends like you who are in the same stage of mommyhood!

Jess Craig said...

good advice. it's like when i let wyatt sip my diet coke and i get evil stares. GET OVER IT RANDOM LADY! (not you, but you know).

Fresh Mommy said...

Perfect answers, I completely agree, us mamas know deep down what to do, and sometimes getting too much information is what gives us that 'guilty' complex. We feel what's best and we know our kids. Beautiful blog and gorgeous baby!!


Bunch of Barrons said...

Love your shots! What a cute blog, too! :)