I have been a little absent lately, from this blog anyway. A lot of the reason is that I just don't have time to write anymore. I have a crazy 2 y/o and a 2 month old (eeeeek, 2 months already!). I am back at work now and am spending all my free time editing and preparing for this summer's schedule.
But you know, a lot of the reason I haven't blogged is that whenever I sit down to write something, I just give up because I don't want to sound like I'm complaining. This really should go without saying but I will say it anyway... of course I am happy to be a Mom and I love my kids to death, AND I am happy to be working again. BUT, I am just tired. I'm straight up exhausted.
I spend my days like this:
changing diapers, preparing toddler meals, feeding the baby, changing more diapers, feeding the baby again, changing more diapers, trying to get toddler to calm down from his tantrum, trying to get baby to nap, trying to keep the toddler calm so he doesn't wake up the finally sleeping baby, putting toddler to nap, changing more diapers, nursing baby again, preparing more meals, comforting a distraught baby, cleaning the disaster zone we live in, oh yah, I have to pee... wait... I have a screaming baby in my hands... gosh i'm hungry, i realize it's 3pm now and i haven't eaten or showered. oh dang, toddler is awake from his nap, better get his lunch ready....on & on & on & on.
you get the point.
I know that sounds really negative, like I'm not enjoying life. But here it is, the truth. Sometimes I don't. I would like to say that I enjoy every single moment of my chaos, but that wouldn't be real. I mean, the reality of a SAHM or WAHM life is actually pretty overwhelming and can be very hard to deal with. I'd say on an average day (before hubs gets home) - I get like 20 minutes to myself. 20 MINUTES. And that's if I can get the kids' naps to overlap.
Some days, I just want to cry because I am hungry and all I want is to take a shower, or take a nap.
And you know me, I always end my posts with a happy thought, but this time. I'm just going to say that I'm tired. For real, I am not super mom, I can not do it all. I will admit it. I need a break.
Okay I lied about not ending with a happy something to say, because look at these tiny little people? I just love them.