28 January 2013

I need social media.

Our generation is so absolutely obsessed with social media. And I'm guilty of this. Guilty guilty guilty.

When I think about our parents generation, you know, the 50's, 60's, 70's... etc. They didn't have Facbeook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Google +. Heck, they didn't even have the internet. Sure, they didn't know what they were missing, but, I'm betting that their lives were just as full-filling as ours is. Right?

So what is with our need to always be connected. Why do we care so much as to stalk people's IG feed and leave comments on people's pictures all day long. Why do we hop onto FB every hour (if not more frequently), to see what everyone else is up to? Why do we feel the need to share so much of our lives online? Isn't it all a little too much sometimes?

Well, the obvious reason is because we need validation. We post photos of our cute kiddos online and just wait for the "oh he's just the cutest kid in the world" comment, you know, to feed our ego. Or take a bathroom selfie and say something like "having such a bad day..." and wait for the encouraging replies to pour in. We are constantly checking blogs and status updates, secretly comparing our lives to those that we "follow". Wondering where we rank among them, hoping we measure up.

Those would be the obvious reasons.

But here's the reason I do it.

I am a twenty-something Mom of two little boys, who quit my "full-time" job to stay at home. I spend my day preparing meals, cleaning, changing diapers, reading books, playing games, comforting, cleaning some more, holding, nurturing, and just BEING with my kids. I talk baby-talk all day long and I am chasing my toddler around 24/7 trying to prevent him from ripping apart our house. Gone are the days that I come first. I never come first.

I NEED TO FEEL CONNECTED. As much as I love & adore my children, and as thankful as I am to have the ability to stay at home with them and give them my personal attention...

I admittedly seek attention from anyone other then little kids. I think we all have a strong desire to be relate-able to people our own age. Right? And to know that others understand what we are going through on a day-to-day basis, because it's dang hard. My adult brain needs to know that I can still carry on a conversation with someone other than a 3 year old. My Mommy brain needs to know that I'm not alone in my struggle to discipline my kids. And my Wife brain needs to know that I'm not the only one that feels less-than gorgeous when my handsome Husband comes home at the end of the day. Surely there are others out there that are feeling the same way I am?

Social media outlets confirm that my craziness isn't crazy at all, that in in fact, I'm perfectly sane. It's normal to be wearing my pajamas at 2:00 in the afternoon. It's normal to be in tears when I feel defeated by my toddler. And it's a normal feeling to want to reach out to those that can relate, to feel that there is an entire community out there that is doing the exact same thing I am. Empathy is a powerful thing. It makes us feel human. And I for one, am grateful for it. I'm grateful for the empathy and understanding I receive from my social media outlets. Are their times I think there's such a thing as sharing TOO much online? Absolutely. And I do think we need to find a balance between all of our  many networks. But if we can find and maintain that balance, social media is beautiful.

I could go on and on about all the bad things about social media as well. But that's a post for another day.

So thank you! Thank you to those that aren't afraid to share the "bad days", I can relate to you! And I'm grateful for all of the positivity as well! It helps me so much to see all of your smiling faces!

And while I'm talking about social media... come find me if you haven't already. All my links on the right sidebar. ;-)

And here is an infamous bathroom selfie, showing off my all-time favorite sweater. You know you love it, too ;-)

18 comments:

Matt and Jen McEvoy said...

I totally agree! I don't know what stay-at-home moms did before there was internet or how they stayed connected and sane, but I am glad I have the internet! I am a recent user of instagram and I LOVE it, probably too much :) I love seeing what everyone else is doing and I am glad I'm not the only one.

High Heeled Life said...

Well written post and so true. The world was small - but with social media it becomes completely accessible. Have a great evening.

Krystal said...

TRUTH. I moved away from friends and family so I *need* social media to have normal conversations with people on a daily basis. ;)

Jennifer Bosse said...

I feel the exact same way! It's crazy; I've been thinking a lot about why I should even care about social media. I'm not super obsessed but I do go on and look at pictures and read blogs, etc. And I do need to have an outlet so that I can relate to others. I love my boy. I do. But it's nice to be able to turn it all off for a little bit.

Gretchen said...

Preach it girl! I get so cooped up being at home and connecting with other mamas and knowing I'm not the only one is essential to my sanity!

Mrs. C. said...

You totally put into words how I feel without me even realizing it. Awesome post girlie.

Tiffany said...

I couldn't agree more. Being home all the time with the kiddos, social media can help keep you sane on some days! :-)

Ariel @ Dreams To Do said...

YES, I LOVE that sweater! And I love social media, too. But mainly just instagram. I am obsessed with instagram. :-)

ADSchill said...

You know I love that sweater. I wish I had one.
And I understand completely all you wrote. That is why I continue to blog and check FB. I need some adult interaction. It will get better when I go back to work, but for now while I am at home all day with an infant...I am so cut off. Especially in the winter while being sick.
Thanks for this relatable post, I know how important it is to reach out to someone.

Tiffany Franklin said...

I think that is something many stay at home moms feel. Most people don't communicate like they used to and technology is always growing more and more. It gives us a way to stay connected to the world and other adults and feel semi human lol. You look great!

nicole. said...

eh... it makes me feel better knowing a million other moms struggle with their defiant toddlers [and quite possibly lock themselves in the bathroom too]

;)

nicole. said...

eh... it makes me feel better knowing a million other moms struggle with their defiant toddlers [and quite possibly lock themselves in the bathroom too]

;)

nicole. said...

eh... it makes me feel better knowing a million other moms struggle with their defiant toddlers [and quite possibly lock themselves in the bathroom too]

;)

nicole. said...

eh... it makes me feel better knowing a million other moms struggle with their defiant toddlers [and quite possibly lock themselves in the bathroom too]

;)

nicole. said...

eh... it makes me feel better knowing a million other moms struggle with their defiant toddlers [and quite possibly lock themselves in the bathroom too]

;)

nicole. said...

eh... it makes me feel better knowing a million other moms struggle with their defiant toddlers [and quite possibly lock themselves in the bathroom too]

;)

Karen said...

I agree, the greatest thing about social media is it keeps me in touch with friends and family, who I wouldn't normally have time to chat with every day!

Sarah [NurseLovesFarmer.com] said...

Amen, sister! I "need to feel connected" is a great reason. I'm cutting back on my iPhone time during the day with my kids, but I really still do need to feel that connection, well said!