23 May 2013

Blogging For You: Being Genuine While Maintaining Integrity


Being Genuine While Maintaining Integrity
(you can find vol. 1 of this series here)

I think this might be the most important aspect of blogging. You probably agree, right? Because if we are talking about Blogging For Ourselves, we should never be anything but genuine.

But the thing is, we know that people are reading our posts (or at least we think they are!), we know people are thinking and judging. So I think that a lot of times, subconsciously, we might all tend to filter just a little bit. And that's not always a bad thing, I mean, everyone needs a filter. But I think the problem with that is sometimes we come across a lot different than we really are.

An example: I have been told that I come across shy and soft spoken on my blog. Well, that's actually kind of laughable because I am anything but soft spoken. I can be a little quiet when I'm in a large group of people I don't know, but I wouldn't consider myself shy. Insecure? Maybe. Shy? Not really. But I make a very deliberate effort to be tasteful and kind when I'm blogging, and I really think that those are attributes that match my personality in real life as well. I've also tended in the past to hold back my deep down, genuine opinions. And apparently, this makes me come across as being "shy." I guess I feel like it's okay, and in fact I should, filter out my overactive opinions sometimes. There is no reason why I need to word vomit all of the things I think about, in the exact way I'm thinking them. Most times, that would just come out all wrong and end up rubbing people the wrong way. Especially considering that it's really hard to tell someones tone of voice through writing.

So I think the question is: how do we find a balance between being our genuine selves on our blogs, but still remain respectful and considerate? The answer is GROWTH. As we grow as people and writers/bloggers, I would hope that we are maturing, and finding ways to express our opinions and thoughts in a kind way. I treat my blog and my readers the same way I would treat any of my friendships, and that is with respect. Yes, this blog is essentially for ME, but there are people that read here, as well as the fact that my kids that will read this at some point down the road, so with that comes a responsibility to be not only genuine, but to do it in a respectful way, and set an example. You know what I mean?

Obviously there are people with different tastes when it comes to the blogs they frequent. Some don't mind reading profanity and never-ending sarcasm and cynicism. And in fact a lot of people find it refreshing when people and brutally honest, and that's totally okay. When you come down it, being brutally honest is being genuine, too. But, for me personally, that's not my cup of tea and since I don't prefer controversy, I usually stay away from blogs like that.

So the bottom line is that being genuine doesn't necessarily mean letting it all hang out all of the time! It means drawing a line between being genuine & going overboard and being abrasive. Personally, if I want to keep my blog meaningful, I try not to cross that line. My integrity is something I value so much, and I do not ever want to compromise that.

But that's just my two cents.

What do you think??

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8 comments:

Adriana Iris La Dulce Vida said...

Such a great post. We always hope that the reader grow with us.

Karen said...

I'm really enjoying this series and I look forward to more!! I agree with this - it's a tough balance. I want to be honest about things but at the same time I feel like I need to keep some things private. And I also have to think about my audience - my Mom and other family members read my blog, so I always want to make sure I'm respectful and not saying things I wouldn't say directly to them. It's definitely something I'm working on - setting the right tone and finding the right balance, while being true to who I am!

Mindi @ Simply Stavish said...

I for sure agree with you. Especially if your blogging about family some things just don't need to be put out for the entire world to see. I feel that being genuine also means being true to yourself. I'm loving this series Mandy!

thelittlebluebungalow said...

I didn't really think you were shy at all. I think its great that I can get to know you by what you write. Sometimes I am not sure what I can share because of the judgement. I am honestly afraid someone local (like my town) will find out I blog (yes I hide it) and judge. Because my town is so small and everyone knows everyone. I guess its a lot of insecurity! But I grow and a little bit more I blog about something personal.
But I think you write just lovely Mandy!

ADSchill said...

Hmm...shy....no. :) I think you are right on with this. Being honest is good, but it's also good to censor a little bit. No need to be someone you aren't, but if people are reading you have to think of thier feelings too.

Nora Spaulding said...

great points and I need to have some growth as well...

graciepie said...

My blog is heavy with sarcastic rants , pushy opinions and cynicism....perhaps this is why i have 92 followers and you have many many more? Fml. See? There i go again...

Jessica said...

Wow, really loving this series. This is another question I've been going back and forth on in my head - how to be myself without being offensive. I think you nailed it on the head with this post though.