But I'm here today to confess something about my marriage.
It's not perfect. It's not even good sometimes.
I think that with social media, it's easy to put a mask on things, to only talk about the good things and the fun times. Even when I have conversations with my friends, and the topic of marriage comes up, I tend to sugar coat some of the disagreements we have, and the truly difficult phases that we go through. But that just isn't real.
Here's what I've realized. I don't need to sugar coat anything because marriage is freaking hard, anyone that has been married, knows that. And I think looking at other marriages online, can make you feel like everyone else has it all together. But, that's just not true.
Philip and I are very similar in a lot of ways, but then at the same time, we're polar opposites. A lot of times it works in our favor, like when we are on the same page... we are REALLY on the same page. Which is awesome because we don't have to even discuss the matter at hand, we just know what we should do. But then when we are on different sides of the fence, things get... tense. We're both very stubborn people who generally feel that our way, is the right way. It's not always easy to find a compromise.
Overall, are we happy? Absolutely! But we go through phases where argue, a lot. We raise our voices, tears get shed, and sometimes it gets to a point where one of us needs to leave the house for a few minutes to cool off. And in those moments, I feel like I'm the only one going through this with my Spouse. I genuinely wonder if I'm just a basket case who gets annoyed and upset with her Husband, or is this common? I'm still figuring that part out ;)
In the last few months, though, I've really been thinking a lot about my marriage. During the days, I'm taking care of two little boys, running a business & a blog, working out 5 days a week, and attempting to keep the house somewhat clean... etc. And My husband is working his butt off at his job, and in the middle of vigorous training for the Seattle to Portland bike race. Things get busy, and sometimes they get stressful. We fight. And we get annoyed with one another. I guess sometimes I feel like we are both so set in our ways, not much can change, you know? But that is exactly the kind of thinking that leads to the path of separation. And I can not, and will not ever go down that road. Change is very possible if you set your mind to it. As a couple, we need to be changing together. Helping & supporting each other. It's not always easy to do, but I know that when push comes to shove, we'll do it. And I will always find a way to try harder, and I'll move mountains to make sure that the foundation of our marriage stays strong. So when we go through the difficult phases, we'll always stay solid, regardless of what is going on.
I guess I'm just putting this out there so that I can continue to do exactly what you all said you liked about my blog... and that is to be honest. I'm not trying to put up a facade or pretend to have it all together. We don't live a fairytale (hence the reason my blog title is a sorta fairytale). And my Husband and I aren't always happy, we don't always get along and we certainly have our share of issues. But at the same time, we love each other and this OUR marriage. We're in this together, now...and forever.