24 June 2014

Sassafras

Ubran Dictionary's Definition of Sassafras:
 -derived from the word sassy. the act of being a smarta**, back-talking, rude and disrespectful; impudent. 

It's been a while since I've talked about my kids. Like, REALLY talked about them, and their growing personalities. So here we go.

I've been kind of naive this past year, thinking we might actually skip the infamous Terrible Two's, and possibly even the Terrible Three's. Mostly because Easton has always been pretty mellow and easy. I've been caught off guard lately, and I've learned that even the most well-behaved little boy can flip at at the drop of a dime and become a tiny terrorist practically over night.


Have I been through this is before with Bennett? Sort of. Bennett was an overly curious toddler that did tend to get into mischief, but for the most part he was pretty oblivious and unassuming. Looking back now, a lot of the behavioral issues we had with him stemmed from his developmental and speech delays. Of course he didn't know what was going on for a while, but a lot of the reasons he was a Terrible Two was just a lack of communication.

Whereas Easton?? He communicates fine. A little TOO fine if you ask me. He is going to be my back-talker. I'm not even kidding, this kid has some serious sass. It's like I'm looking at a mini version of myself in him. Because I have a feeling I was just like this as a kid. And I'll tell you what, it's exhausting.

But I'm in new territory here. I honestly don't know how to deal with his attitude. In the olden days, a good mouth-washing with some soap might do the trick. But I'll go ahead and rule that out as one of the options, because nowadays that kind of punishment will get CPS called on you.

Basically I've just been putting him in time-out's when he talks back or is just being flat out defiant. Not sure it's working, though, because I can't tell you how badly it grinds my gears when my barely 2 Year Old responds to his punishment by saying "No Mama, you go to time out!!" the proceeds to reach out and push me toward the infamous time-out corner.

Ugh.

Gosh, right when you think you have the parenting thing figured out, your child turns a new leaf and totally baffles you. I'm not posting this to be a whiny, complaining parent... okay maybe I am just for a second. But I'm really posting this because 1)it's real life and one day I will look back and laugh at this stage and 2) I NEED ADVISE!!

How do you handle your little sassafras??

22 comments:

Ashley Z. said...

I can't wait to be a parent. sounds fun! ;)

Jess Beer said...

I have no advice...but I'm sure I'm not far behind you. Abbie is stubborn as anything and once she really starts talking, I think I'm in trouble!

Stephanie Clark said...

Oh how I can relate to this! I'm TRYING not to say "no" and "don't" so much and give him two clear choices instead but yesterday morning I felt SO defeated when trying to get Jonah out the door. I mean he wanted to sit on the toilet and play on the ipad - like all day long - they are just so irrational sometimes. Time out or quiet time will work, you might just have to do it 15 times in a row for him to get it! Have you read any of the Super Nanny/Jo Frost books? I used to suggest them to parents for kids with behavioral problems when I worked with kids. Keep at it mom. Teach him to use that sass for good!

Ashley Griffith said...

No advice here since we don't have kids yet, but I've been through those phases with nieces and nephews and it is SO tiring at times! Good luck!

Kala Bernier said...

UMM B and E are seriously starting to look like twins!!!!

Christen P said...

How I handle my kids- they are 6 and 10 now. I can tell you I made a lot of mistakes. I had so many plans of being the perfect parent. I read and still read so many books. But I mess up and do things in a way I never intended at times. I thought I was going to be Ms Positive Parenting- no needs for rules, everyone is happy and secure, certainly no yelling. Well, I sometimes literally yell "NOOOOO!!!!!" "STOP IT!!!!!" My advice: Don't ever beat yourself up. Nobody is perfect. And when we beat ourselves up the kids learn to do the same to themselves. A great book that I love is called "Screamfree Parenting"

Cindy said...

I have teenagers. You don't look back on that stage and laugh. You are just glad you made it thru it!

Kendall Rayburn said...

Well, Wyatt has a speech delay so he can't say much - but he has completely mastered the "stink-eye" - when his speech catches up I'm going to be in a WORLD of trouble! SO I'll have to reference this post later! ;)

Miranda Myrabev said...

I am always worried about my future kids because I was a little tyrant to my mummy so if as it's known double your parents character then I am in trouble x

Sylvia Cook Photography said...

YES, YeS and yes! That little booger is his mommie's son :) Nothing works, the kid is testing and learning and growing. Either timeouts or taking away something he enjoys. Or repeatedly telling him "wait till your father gets home"...jk about that last one, I was not able to try that one out personally.
If it makes you feel any better, he's always worse with you.
Hopefully, this too shall pass.

Sarah said...

Timeouts have worked for my daughter, but not with my boys. My middle son is 4 & non-verbal (he was diagnosed with Autism at the beginning of the year) and he responds pretty well when we tell him no. My youngest is 2 & we are still working on communication with him. He knows when he's in trouble, but he will just stand there and smile and laugh - which can be cute and irritating at the same time. What I've noticed is that consistent punishment (timeouts every time they are defiant, mean, etc) really makes a difference. When I was younger, I got my mouth washed out with soap and I learned pretty quickly not to back talk, but like you said - CPS would probably get involved nowadays. Good luck mama!

Christine Mondy said...

Yeah, good luck with yours. My 7yro just now starting copping attitude with me and talking back. I've been putting him in the corner for time outs but it hasn't changed. And don't get me started on the dirty looks I get when I tell him to get in there, wow! :( I am hoping this is a phase and it will pass eventually. I don't know if I should just ignore it, or keep up with the time outs.

Jordan Wise said...

I literally laughed out loud. This was awesome! and I love that you added the definition.

Brenda D Priddy said...

Both of my girls are stubborn little spitfires, so I definitely feel you! But, I have no solutions. Maybe wine.

Esther Ju*Lee said...

i have zero experience as a parent, but just watching my friends raise kids is exhausting.

celery and cupcakes said...

I'm expecting my first born, a little boy in September! I can't wait for the fun to begin. :-)

Rebekah Clarke said...

LOL oh my! We avoided the terrible two's and ended up with the... ferocious fours? I don't even know what you call them, it's awful and I miss my sweet little boy. Cordelia will be the back talker for sure - she already stares at you and screams if you aren't doing exactly what she wants.

The mama mantra 'it's just a phase... it's just a phase...'

Life with Amberly said...

Hahaha, I love the urban dictionary definition! :)

Kiara Buechler said...

I have no advice, some friend I am huh! All I can say is yes yes yes, I know exactly what you are going through. Unfortunately I don't think it will get any better over the next few years ;-) I guess the best thing to do is to look at the bright side: that sass brings with it a ton of really funny moments that will just make you shake your head and laugh. I've found the key with D is that I have to keep my cool. If I lose my shiz, he loses his every more and it snowballs into a really awful experience. I am still working on how to calm myself down, any advice on that is welcome.

Betsy said...

Oh man, that's rough! I'm not a mama, so I can't give you advice, but I'll cheer you on in spirit!

The Girl who Loved to Write said...

Oh, but he sure is cute!!

Alicia Snow said...

Hahaha at least he's cute to make-up for it!